December for me is a time of joy – one does love Christmas dearly, and as one grows older, it becomes less about the presents and more about the cheer, the gathering of family and friends, the carols and the laughter. the birth of our Lord and Saviour, but also the warm, loving ending to another year, welcoming another.
But December for me is, as well, a time of remembrance and regret. There are things one has done and which hurt, things that are mostly swept away and kept quietly and forgotten, but still show up once in a while to bother. One gets better at hiding them and tucking them aside, and one hopes one day, it will be forgotten.
It is too, for me, a time of mourning, and of goodbyes and farewells, and a time to consider that life is truly, fragile, as the year comes to a natural end and yet, like a phoenix, it is born anew.
cyclical, circular, remember, eternal – joy and sorrow and the heralding of angels.